Prepare for IEP Meetings:

For Educators and Therapists

IEP stands for Individualized Education Program and is a legal contract between a school and parent or caregiver. It is needed for any child to receive services outside of the general education curriculum such as speech therapy or special education services. IEP meetings must occur at least once a year to update goals and discuss progress or concerns.

IEP meetings can be nerve-wracking. I remember meetings in my early days, just starting out as an SLP, and often feeling thrown to the wolves. I loved the school I worked in, but parents were notorious for having lawyers and advocates. It seemed that every parent had one 😕

I didn’t realize how litigious this particular school system was until I left. I learned a lot, but I am breathing easier now. Maybe I am feeling more confident about my own knowledge and skills or maybe I feel more supported by my current schools and parents.

Hopefully, my experience can help other educators and therapists prepare for IEP meetings and handle the unexpected.

Be Willing to Problem Solve

Parents come to meetings with their own list of concerns. It’s not uncommon for their concerns to vary from what educators and therapists are seeing at school. For example, children who stutter may not exhibit disfluencies at school, but the parent swears up and down that it is constant at home. Or children tell their parents they don’t like school and have no friends but are a social butterfly in every class.

Be willing to engage IEP team members in a discussion about what to do in these situations. It’s not all on one person to address a teacher or parent’s concern. Dialogue should take place about what, if any, areas of education are impacted by these concerns and how they can be addressed.

It’s important to think outside the box. Skills don’t happen in a vacuum. In my world of Speech-Language Pathology, kids are communicating all day long, not just with me. So, if a parent is pushing for a specific goal or frequency of services, are there other people on the IEP team that can absorb some of those things and work on them as well? I’m happy to give the teacher fluency strategies that they can remind the student to use in the classroom when answering questions in class or presenting. Wouldn’t that be even more beneficial for the student by making their goals functional?

Come with Examples

Parents fall on their own spectrum. There are parents who are not going to believe that their child needs help and there are parents who are not going to believe that their child doesn’t need help. Most parents fall in the middle of this continuum.

You will get to know each parent and what their expectations are as well as their personality. This can take time though! Regardless of how well you know the parent and what their concerns are, come to the meeting with examples.

I feel like Occupational Therapists (OTs) have it the easiest here. They can bring in handwriting samples as a tangible example. ✏️  SLPs can bring up examples of how a student might respond to wh questions, how they may pronounce words with a specific sound, or how they may have difficulty initiating interactions with peers. I find that if I am specific in my examples, most of the time the teachers and parents nod their heads in agreement. That gives me more buy-in when I share my recommendations for goals and frequency.

Come with Research

No need to get too technical here unless you have a parent or lawyer who requests it, but having some research to refer to is always helpful. Keep it light by referring to developmental milestones or grade-level expectations and providing examples of how the student is or is not meeting those.

If the parent asks for specific references, volunteer to send that later. I like to send a mix of peer-reviewed content as well as parent-friendly material.

Sometimes You Have to Say Yes

Sometimes the only answer to a parent, lawyer, or advocate will accept is yes. It is so frustrating when this happens because the majority of the time, the request is not in the child’s best interest. Most lawyers or advocates come in with a generic laundry list of requests and see how many they can get the school to cave to. 😡

More times than I care to admit, I’ve been backed into a corner where the only option was to write the goal or frequency the parent demanded. In this case, the best you can do is document the student’s performance and progress clearly and make a better case next year. Sometimes building a parent’s trust and having your recommendations heard takes time. I’ve even had parents that were so nasty one year, only to be happy and agreeable the following year. I think sometimes they just want to flex their muscles before they are ready to accept recommendations.

Show Compassion

Even though there are parents who take out their frustrations of the world on the IEP team, you can’t take it personally. They are scared and angry. Parents of preschoolers may be going through the stages of grief as they learn of a new diagnosis, such as autism, and what their future holds. Parents of high schoolers often worry about what will happen after their child ages out of the school system but won’t have a job or go to a trade school.

Even with the angriest and surliest of parents, try to look at them with a little compassion. Look past the anger, yelling, and name-calling and see the fear or pain in their eyes. It does help to change your perspective, at least for a moment, and see things more clearly. All their emotions are not a reflection of you and your skill set, but a reflection of their attitudes and understanding of their child’s strengths and weaknesses, as well as their emotional state at that moment.

Consider the Parents’ Background

Parents come from all educational and professional backgrounds. Our lingo is most likely quite different from what they are used to and can be overwhelming. Break down information the same way you would for your students (of course in an age-appropriate way). The parent may need more content presented in a written format vs. verbal or vice versa. A parent may struggle to understand the vocabulary used and need more definitions or examples. Parents who struggle with social skills themselves may seem anxious or volatile in meetings when in reality they think they are just having a conversation. Understanding parents help us understand students better, which helps us be more compassionate to both parents and students.

 

Each IEP meeting is a chance to enhance your own skills while sharing helpful information with parents. So, take a deep breath, meditate, and have that glass of wine ready when you get home. 😉 What tips do you have for educators and therapists about IEP meetings?